Updated on 18 May, 2020, Tasmania
It is important that we spend time trying to understand what is happening around us at a time of change. Recently, I made an enormous change in life. Having said goodbye to a teaching career that lasted for decades, I embarked on a new journey, both literally and figuratively. The physical journey took me to a new hemisphere, a new country, a new climate, and a new way of life. Mentally, I am adjusting to my new identity as a writer. However challenging the adaptation is, I am psychologically prepared for a different life, for better and for worse. Unlike most people who are now struggling through this pandemic, I am not so worried, not because I am immune to the virus, but I knew the fact that these important life decisions would induce different emotions as a result of a change in my job status, and my financial situation. Without a full-time job and a stable income, my situation is similar to that of many who have been stood down in the last couple of weeks. I am, however, of a different kind. Since I made a major life change voluntarily, I am willing to accept offers of all kinds, including any social distancing policies that aim to flatten the curve of the coronavirus infections. I treat them as part of the process of my identity change. Only if the pandemic goes on would I then ask myself these questions: How and why did the pandemic occur, and how do I react to it?
To answer these questions, I did some research to find out the difference between an epidemic and a pandemic. The World Health Organisation only acknowledged coronavirus as a pandemic on 11th March 2020 when it spread to more than 110 countries with more than 118,000 people being infected globally. By then, the death rate had already risen to 4,200. For months before that, it was considered an epidemic, which implies that the outbreak was confined to a community, group, or region. It was almost as if the virus was eager to live up to its name, the number of cases surged out of control since it acquired a new status. As I was updating my essay, there were over 4.7 million confirmed cases, and the virus spread to 215 countries. More than three hundred and sixteen thousand people died globally (the death rate tripled since I finished my draft last month), with the highest death toll in the US (90,975), the UK (34,636), Italy (31,908), Spain (27,650), and France (28,108). The figures are alarmingly on the rise still. Coronavirus or Covid-19 has truly become a pandemic, affecting so many countries and their people on a global level.
For a disease to be spreading far and wide, all it requires is a human agent, a condition that any of us is capable of, and yet none of us would be proud of. I don’t think any of us would be ready to admit that we all have a part to play in causing this pandemic to occur; most of us would rather choose to call the virus “our invisible enemy”, to quote the US president. But should we only blame it on the virus? Shouldn’t we take some time to reflect on the modern way of life, and see how we might help spread the disease? Any outcome results from a series of actions that involve complicated decision-making processes, most, if not all of which, I would argue are in the hands of individuals. I don’t suppose it is a very popular idea for no one wants to bear the guilt of spreading the virus. Before you reject my idea, let’s move the clock back to the pre-virus period: early this year or even a little earlier, the last few months of 2019 when most people had not heard of this virus. If you keep a journal like I do, you can perhaps refer to it, and trace back the time when you had your first contact with the virus, or any bad element that sends out a warning signal. Did you take note of any telltale signs? If you did, what was your reaction? Did you choose to ignore them, or did you let them guide your course of life?
In my entry on 20th October, 2019, I expressed my fear for an “invisible hand of a murderer that is tightening its grip on everyone’s throat”. At that moment, I was referring to how the Hong Kong Government was encroaching on its people’s freedom of expression, freedom of assembly, and freedom of the press. These values are highly important. Without public debate, we would never have any knowledge of government intentions. People can only follow the policies but have no idea of the rationale behind. Nothing is worse than living in the dark. How can one plan her future that is beyond her control? Imagine a child working diligently on a set of building blocks, checking her structure expectantly with a satisfied smile without knowing that some kid is waiting to knock it down due to jealousy, or simply absent-mindedness. This naughty kid is not necessarily evil. However, in an absence of checks and balance, a good kid, or a good government can turn bad, and most certainly, it will turn evil if it has the chance.
Eight days later, I wrote another entry about a mystery eye infection that kept troubling me for months. For no reason at all, my eyes were teary and itchy. In their worst condition, I wasn’t able to wear my contact lens. I tried to soothe the pain with eye-drops. I kept rubbing essential oils on my neck and shoulders to rid any other infections that troubled me. This helped although the infection never went away completely until I moved to Australia. Soon after I left Hong Kong, the infection disappeared. As soon as I arrived in Tasmania in February, I could wear contact lens again. During the months of my infection, I blamed it on the air pollution in Hong Kong that was further exacerbated by thousands of rounds of teargas. Since June, hundreds of thousands of citizens came out to the streets to protest against the proposal of an extradition law that would allow the Hong Kong Government to send anyone who is suspected of breaking the law back to China. Of course, no one wants to be sent back to China since it has a very different legal system than Hong Kong. These peaceful gatherings were almost always suppressed clumsily, a common method being adopted by the police was to spray teargas indiscriminately on the protesters. As people continued with their protest for months, you can imagine how bad the air quality could be. I naturally put the air pollution and my eye infection together. Looking back, the infection could have been caused by a more deadly virus, something that was unknown to any of us at the time.
My actions in the following months were subconsciously guided by these events even though I did not register their significance. To avoid attracting any attention from those in power, I decided not to publish my third novel that contains a section about the Tiananmen Square massacre. I didn’t want my novel to be strangled. Because of my persistent eye infection, I cancelled quite many social gatherings. My anti-social behaviour turned out to be my best protective gear. During the time when coronavirus was unknown to me, I reacted out of my natural instinct. I might seem to have overreacted, and was once annoyed by my own coward behaviour. I wondered why I should be bothered with upsetting some evil power that I don’t care about any longer? Why do I choose to withdraw rather than confronting it? Perhaps in my mature years, I learned to be patient. By turning inward, consulting my guiding star, I made a smooth departure. Now, I no longer live under the threat of a bad government.
There is no easy answer to the question of how and why the world is now suffering from this pandemic. My humble experience tells me that it’s mainly due to bad and stupid governance when those in power do not think that ordinary people deserve the right to get hold of all the essential information. In a case of epidemic-turn-pandemic, so many mega-powers are involved that the responsibility or the guilt is very much diluted. Timelines of the pandemic have been created by different parties, and I am not at all surprised to see each of them chooses to highlight events in its best interest, for the purpose for pointing the finger to some other party. As information of all sorts, ranging from semi-truths to fabricated lies slowly trickles down to us, we must be vigilant. There is no reason why we solely rely on a single source of news. In this digital age, there is no excuse for not being able to gain access to multiple perspectives. In a time when the pandemic wreaked havoc with our lives, we would perhaps instinctively act out of fear, blindly following other people’s actions. But isn’t it true that every human being is different? Shouldn’t we find a unique way to get over this pandemic? Whether you choose to fight or flight, it will take you to the right path as long as you are proactive in seeking out information, and be open to different views. So your decisions are always based on something, be it an event, a piece of news, an analysis, or simply your own feeling. Trust your own decisions even though you may not completely understand your actions at the time. The information collected over time will help analyse your own subconscious thoughts afterwards. This is how I react to this pandemic, or any crisis in life.